LYRICS

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A Little Ice Cream (In My Cone)  (excerpt)

For when I finish both the scoops
I find there’s somethin’ missin’ "Oops!"
I looked inside my cone and nearly died
I’m confident you will agree
An empty cone is blasphemy
He packed the cream on top, but not inside!

So stuff my cone with ice cream, sir

And satisfy this customer

I just expect to get

What I paid for

I'm meltin' from the summer heat

So serve me somethin' soft and sweet

You're not done with me yet

I want some more

I only ask for what is fair

So please fill in what isn't there

Stuff a little ice cream in my cone.

My Canada (excerpt)

This Canada's different from the one I grew up in
This Canada's caught the subtle sickness from within
Now I don’t expect things to remain the way they’ve always been
But my Canada‘s dyin’ and it needs some medicine

Pitchforks and torches help to get the point across
An angry mob will capture the attention of the boss
They say there’s little change that kind of action can achieve
And if I were king that’s what I’d want my peasants to believe

Over The Top (excerpt)

Subtle and small
Don’t suit me at all
They lead to slumber and snoring;
Blatant and big
Is the style that I dig
‘Cause less ‘isn’t more, it’s boring.

Over the top, let me warn you
If you’re a maven of taste
Over the top, this is your cue:
Seek safe haven - make haste!
It’s not gonna be
A tasteful display
You’re certainly free
To be on your way
The bawdy gaudy side of things
Is ‘bout to be embraced.

Dancing With The Ghost Of You  (excerpt)

You’ve gone away I know
But I can’t let you go
And though I know that you have gone
Your memory still lingers on
And now and then I think I see
A vision of your face advance
And softly it says will you dance
Until the end of time with me.

I’ll flit around the floor
The way we did before
And do the steps that we once used to do
But it’s not a duet
The closest that I get
Is dancing with the ghost of you.

Steppin' Out (And Struttin' In) (excerpt)
It has always been you
That they get introduced to
You’re more fun
You’re number one
You always hit a home run
But I’m done with all of that
It’s time I took my turn at bat

I don’t belong upon the bench my bite is worse than my bark
So I’m steppin' up to the plate and knockin’ this one out of the park.

I know what it takes
Cause I’ve seen your mistakes
And I’ve wiped tears of pain from your eyes
I’m glad that I know
How it feels to be low
Now I’m headed for a whole lotta highs.

All In the Same Boat (excerpt)

 Because we're all in the same boat my dear 

This much I know is true 

And we could be dead at ninety or next week 

But we needn't face the facts with fear Or spend life bein’ blue 

But the moment that you’re born you’ve sprung a leak.   

So take a breath and please take note

 I don't want you to panic 

But we're all in the same boat 

And I'm afraid it's the Titanic   

But the iceberg hasn't hit us yet 

We're livin’ ‘til we’re dead 

So just get behind the course you've set 

And sail full steam ahead.
 

Geeks Like Us (excerpt)  

You see fitting in has never been what we’re all about 

It does seem clear we’ve been put here to stand right on out 

Though some may claim it must be lame to feel like we don’t fit 

We break the mold and truth be told we do not give a sh%# 

But sometimes I cry, and I think I’ll die if I don’t get some nookie And for the right guy – I tell no lie – I’d gladly shave my wookie.  

Though we run into frustrations In some social situations 

Though they point and stare and mock us ‘Cause we’re dressed as two Chewbaccas

 They’re just jealous (just jealous!) Cause they’ll never (never ever!) 

Be as fabulous and fun or point five percent as clever 

We’ve made it very clear there’s nothing left to discuss 

Get in line to wine and dine a pair of geeks like us! 

Twenty Years Ago (excerpt) 

If I’d started 20 years ago to scrimp and save 

I’d have a large amount In my bank account. 

If I’d only just applied myself, been a little brave 

And not listened to fear I’d have a great career.  

If I’d started 20 years ago 

Told all my foolish fears to go 

No multitude of tears would flow ‘Cause it all went up in smoke. 

If I’d risked and used some common sense,  I wouldn’t be a nobody and broke. 

I Don't Play an Instrument (excerpt)  

I’d sax your phone and french your horn,

I’d grease your trombone’s slide 

I’d whet your whistle ‘til the morn 

And you would vibrate from inside    

I’d pump your organ, beat your drum I’d even bang your gong I’d squeeze your box and make it hum

And ring your bell with a big "ding dong"  

I don’t play an instrument,

But I’m ready to commit

And all my free time will be spent

On you and I’ll never quit.

A Simple Kindness (excerpt)

We share the same philosophies on music, books, and art

We’re thick as thieves and everyone can tell

And the way you make me laugh makes me offer you my heart

I can’t believe how hard and fast I fell…oh well.  

I’ve got plans again tonight

To see a show and have a drink or two, with you

And if I’m careless I just might

Pretend you’re falling for the charms I’ve got, you’re not  

Though we’re wonderful together

In my head I think I’m clever

Enough to know we’ll never share a key, I see 

A simple kindness in your eyes

Becomes a complicated love for me

Vicky The Vegan. (excerpt)  

Don't panic

It's organic!

There's an indigenous farmer's face on the label

It's not sprayed

Or GMO

It's fair trade

Drug free and so

It's fit to be called food at your table.

In My Day

 A homosexual would have to live life underground

And meet guys in the bathroom where they park all the Greyhounds.

The rednecks would attack them if they kissed while having lunch

Nowadays it's called a gay bash

 In my day it was fruit punch. 

Yes in my day,  it was difficult to be 

A little different from the rest of the majority 

Yes in my day It was safer to conform You’d buy a house with Norma 

But you’d have affairs with Norm

It's hard to say which generation had it figured out

Some things have gotten better I can say without a doubt.  

But then I think the kids today have got the whole thing wrong 

Nobody used to ask us "Are there peanuts in this song?"

Not On The Poster (excerpt) 

I’m not on the poster 

I’m prob’ly not gettin’ paid 

An’ lookin’ round here 

I’m the only queer 

So I’m prob’ly not gettin’ laid.  

I guess I’m supposed ta 

Let it go and let it slide

 I guess that I should 

Just say it’s all good 

Like it never hurt my pride 

Like I don’t feel sad 

And I don’t feel bad 

In fact I’m feelin’ swell. 

Who cares if I got 

On the poster or not 

Why worry? 

What the hell?  

I’ve gotta let it go 

Get on with the show 

Suck it up and act my age 

'Cause I may not be on the poster, but folks (nevertheless) 

I’m on the stage.  

(One Hell Of) An Entertainin' Show (excerpt) 

And soon enough, ideas came 

My seedlings had begun to sprout 

And though it’s true that most were lame 

A few survived the weeding out  

And I know when you climb 

That ya gotta start small 

A tree takes its time 

To get so tall 

But without a seed 

It’s guaranteed 

Nothin’s ever gonna grow  

The grip of doubt

Is strong indeed 

And the mind is full of fear 

But I busted out 

Got myself freed 

And I’m standin’ right up here

Guess I musta let it go 

And got rid of doubt 

So I can’t be a pro 

My first time out 

But these bits are swell 

And it’s one hell 

Of an entertainin’ show!  

Done As An Extra

I'm startin' to fret

'Cause I never get

A chance to show off what I got

They don’t seem to see

The potential in me

And I’m getting pretty distraught  

I know I’m no beauty like Marilyn Monroe

But all that I need is a chance

I feel it’s my duty to let you all know

How good I am at song and dance

I know they say to be content with things as they are  

But I ain’t satisfied and so I’m raisin’ the bar

My dancing and my dialogue just need a directa

It’s cruel to say I can’t compete so let me correct ya

It’s boring in the background and I’m done as an extra

I wanna be a big star! 

From Now On (excerpt)

From behind 

I can see 

Who’ll be first to win the race 

I don’t mind 

That it’s not me 

Nothin' wrong with second place 'Cause the pain helps me grow 

But I’d still like to know 

What it might be like to win 

From behind I’m about to begin

And I know you would want me to touch the sky 

But I’m not gonna get there if I never try 

And I know 

That I’m ready to go 

Make it on my own 

And I gotta go now 

But I won’t forget how you showed me how.

Giant's Song (from "Thunderfoot")

I chose to live alone 

A giant heart of stone 

And I came to know

 I could only go 

Where no one else could see   

The mountains and the roaring sea Were places that were big like me 

But spring or fall I

 still felt small 

With no one else to share my heart with   

Missing what I had before 

Wishing I could just restore 

The way my life was then 

Cause I remember when 

I knew what human hearts existed for     

I pulled myself away from love Believing they would take care of 

My darling little one 

My precious little son 

Who I’m now looking down on from above